I’ve been thinking a lot about sheep lately, sometimes directly, sometimes otherwise. Last night I read the Shepherd’s Psalm and Jesus’ words about the Gate and the Good Shepherd.

Anne is spending the weekend on the Bruce’s Sheep Farm. All I know that she is having a “sweet time” (and I’m happy about that!) I’m remembering our two days on the sheep farm last October, one of the highlights of my trip to New Zealand.

I’ve been thinking about sheep indirectly as I’ve played with dyeing yarn–made from sheep wool–for the past several weeks. Although my ultimate goal is to learn about dyeing fabric (cellulose fibers from cotton plants, not the protein fibers of sheep,) sheep wool has been accessible and easy as a medium. And I’m almost always knitting something so I’m working with sheep wool in that way too.

My current quilt project is made up with “sheep” fabric in red and green. I’m still in the design-board process, though ready to start sewing as soon as I find a small chunk of time.

But last night, after Johnny woke me up around 1:30 upset because he couldn’t sleep (that makes two of us now,)  after he had left to go back downstairs to try to sleep, I spent some time reading in John 10 and Psalm 23, about Jesus’ claim to be the Gate for the sheep and the Good Shepherd. I’d gotten to this point in my gospel reading a few weeks ago and kind of got “stuck” there. I liked thinking about God as my shepherd and didn’t move on the next few times I’d opened my Bible. It’s not like I’ve been thinking about it a lot; more that when I went to read I just wanted to go over that ground again before moving on.

However, last night I wanted to spend some time praying for Johnny and my mind was immediately turned back to John 10. Jesus is talking to the Pharisees at this point, using the metaphor of sheep. He first calls himself the Gate, the one whom through the sheep must enter the sheepfold. He says, “Very truly, I tell you Pharisees, anyone who does not enter the sheep fold through the gate, but climbs in some other way, is a thief and a robber. The one who enters by the gate is the shepherd of the sheep. The gatekeeper opens the gate for him, and the sheep hear his voice and the sheep listen to his voice” (John 10:1-3.) The author of John soon explains that Jesus used this figure of sheep, but that the Pharisees didn’t get it.

“Therefore” it says, Jesus kept talking. He said he is the Gate and they are thieves and robbers. He stakes a very strong claim: “I am the Gate; whoever enters through me will be saved. They will go in and out and find pasture.” Sounds good. Jesus certainly affirms this later when he says he is the way, the truth and the life. “No one comes to the Father, but by me (John 14:6.)

Jesus message is one of inclusion and yet it recognizes that not everybody enters the sheepfold through the gate. Some come over the top but their purpose is not to bring life; they come to steal, kill and destroy the sheep.

Then Jesus quickly changes the metaphor. He is not only the gate, the way, but he is the Good Shepherd. As the shepherd he 1) knows his sheep and is known by them; 2) gives life and life more abundantly; 3) lays his life down for the sheep; 4) gives them eternal life and promises that no one will pluck them out of his hand.

A year ago, Anne and I spent some time with Colin, a shepherd. Perhaps not a typical, biblical-day shepherd, but a sheep farmer who cares for many sheep. Two incidents of the days we spent with him stand out in my mind: The first day we rode around with him while he checked his hoggets or “teenage moms” during lambing. Most of the sheep gave birth out in the field without any help but sometimes they had problems. We were driving around the pasture, checking on the sheep, when Colin noticed a hogget having trouble. The lamb was halfway out, dead. He pulled the 4×4 up alongside and jumped out, grabbing his crook. The sheep ran away and Colin had to grab it with the crook and wrestle it to the ground in order to help it. (That amazed me! First of all, I can’t imagine running with offspring half out the birth canal and secondly, didn’t the sheep understand that help was on the way? Didn’t she recognize the shepherd’s voice? Obviously not.)

The second day, we were helping Colin move the flock from one paddock to another. Anne and Colin were on mountain bikes herding the sheep along with the dog. I was riding the 4×4, simply there to head off the sheep that might not follow the crowd through the gate. We moved a couple flocks this way, but Colin noticed that one of the lambs had stayed behind in the old paddock. So he hopped on the 4×4 with Anne and I in the trailer behind him–and took us for the ride of our lives! He was chasing the little lamb, but we were getting a crazy ride of speed, quick turns, and lots of laughter as we chased the lamb all over the paddock. I don’t know if the lamb was independent or scared, but it took us well over 15 minutes to capture the small lamb so that we could make sure it got back with its mother in the proper paddock. When Colin finally caught the little lamb, he handed it to Anne and then pulled out a can of spray paint and painted its forehead with the letter “C.” I’m not sure what that meant except that Colin needed to be able to identify the lamb later and make sure it had gotten back with its mother. Or it wouldn’t survive.

Not exactly sheep that follow the shepherd, that hear know his voice and follow him. I’m not sure it that is just the difference between older styles of shepherding vs sheep farming or if sheep are really as stupid as they say. Why run from help? And yet, don’t we do the same thing? Don’t we prefer to run our lives on our own terms, easily listening to the voices of other shepherds, ones whose goal is not life abundantly but whose goal is to steal, kill and destroy?

As I prayed for my son, I asked God to be the Gate and the Good Shepherd for him, to chase him down and tackle him if necessary, to help him whether he wants God’s help or not. I also asked for protection from the false shepherds. I hung on to the words of Jesus: “no one will snatch them out of my hand…no one will snatch them out of the Father’s hands” (John 10:28-29.) I believe Johnny entered the sheepfold many years ago and still tries to listen to the voice of the Shepherd. But he wants to do so on his own terms and he listens to the siren call of other false shepherds. Somedays it looks like these others have succeeded in stealing and destroying my son. So I asked, I begged, please hold Johnny tightly in your hand. So this is my prayer for the lamb that you’ve given to me (–one stuck in the birth canal?) Be the good Shepherd to John. And to me.

Even if it means tackling us.

The Lord is my Shepherd.
I have everything I need.
He makes me lies down in green pastures.
He leads me beside the quiet waters.
He refreshes my soul.
He guides me along the right paths for his name’s sake.
Even though I walk through the darkest valley,
I will fear no evil for you are with me.
Your rod and your staff comfort me.
You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint me head with oil (welcome!)
My cup overflows (stay a while longer!)
Surely goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life.
And I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever. (Psalm 23)