Another familiar quote by C.S. Lewis follows:
“Pain insists upon being attended to. God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks in our consciences, but shouts in our pains. It is his megaphone to rouse a deaf world.”
I probably should look up the context of the quote because I’m not hearing anything, no whispers, no nudging of my conscience, and certainly no one shouting except the pain itself. And even then it is a weak, dull ache that consumes my attention (when I’m awake.) Thankfully there seem to be periods of sleep that give me a reprieve.
The quotation is from Lewis’ book, The Problem of Pain. That helps a bit. My tissues were cut and sewed together so there is pain as a result. It doesn’t need to mean anything. It is the body’s natural response injury, whether inflicted by accident or by qualified surgeons. Pain medications thankfully are able to control or alleviate some level of the pain, though not without side effects.
Today I’ve been able to read and type, eat, and make it through an entire movie. I made it upstairs to shower and visited with a few friends that stopped by. And took about 15 naps, down from 30.
Tomorrow Mari hopscotches ahead of me for brief surgery (early am) to take a little more tissue from the anterior margin of her lumpectomy, place a port, and possibly drain a swelling in the axillary region. Tomorrow night she teaches class in Dayton. Please pray with me on her behalf.
Tomorrow I should be hearing from my surgeon about the final pathology reports from surgery and setting up appointments for Tuesday morning. I’m already scheduled to see a highly recommended oncologist at Rush, finally a woman doctor, well-loved by her patients, and hoping to also schedule a brief appointment with Dr. Kouris and/or his nurse. Both he and my surgeon leave on Thursday for Spring Break vacations and I would feel a lot better seeing one of them before they go away. I just need someone to look me over and say everything is going as planned and given realistic expectations for the next week. Hopefully Tuesday will be a full day.
Please also pray for John’s 89 year old dad who seems to be slipping a bit more every day. As soon as things stabilize for me, John needs to make a quick visit out to see his dad before it is too late. Ten years ago I left John 2 weeks after his prostate surgery for a pre-planned visit to Laura in France so this seems like a reasonable trade-off. I got the better end of the deal, of course, John’s visit to Pennsylvania won’t be quite so appealing as Grenoble. Even though he comes across as rock solid, he needs your prayers as much as I do, if not more.
As the shouting pain subsides, as I hope it will very soon, please pray that I hear the other voices of God’s love and care. I’m certainly feeling well loved by friends, family, and co-workers (who delivered restaurant gift cards worth 10 pizzas, 8 hamburgers, 10 subs, and a few salads, cookies, and a chocolate cake tonight. Lizi is thinking that this isn’t turning out so bad after all 🙂 We’ve had a week’s worth of meals delivered in the first three days and beautiful flowers and plants, of all shapes, sizes and smells. Best of all are the emails, texts and comments popping up regularly on my I-phone. Who could ask for more?
Not me.